Tag Archives: kitchen mishaps

Appliance serial killer

16 Aug

I have declared my blender dead. I am sad, but it’s time to come to terms with the facts. The sooner I mourn, the sooner I can move on to a new blender.

It appears, however, that I may be to blame — not only that, but I may be out of control. This morning, the coffee pot at work decided not to function. I spent an hour troubleshooting to no avail, searched for the manual, and then texted a colleague who is out of the office today.

Ahhh! What if she’s right? What if I’m on a killing spree without even realizing it?! And I’m a vegetarian. 😦 So now I suspect I’m like the Wolfman, except that instead of, you know, turning into a wolf during the full moon and doing unspeakable acts I cannot remember, I am blacking out perhaps at night and destroying my favorite appliances with no memory. I MUST BE STOPPED.

Hide your food processors. Hide your toasters. I’m on the loose.


Creamy delicious vegan recipes

15 Aug

It appears the blender truly is deceased — or at least on its way — as much as I keep hoping it’ll change its mind. Time to whack it on the head, I suppose. Unfortunately, my financial situation prevents me from just buying a new one. Man do I envy others (or Past Brigid) who could buy $50 appliances whenever they want. Instead, I will probably hit up Goodwill to see if I can get my hands on something for $10 or less that’ll at least keep me pureeing for a little longer.

Speaking of kitchen mishaps, I had another one last night. Let me back up to say that I was home alone last night while my sexy Latin man was filming in Burbank. I spent the entire evening (not exaggerating) cooking for today. Now, it was mostly inactive, so don’t pity me too much, but there were a lot of steps, and it took FOR-EV-ER. The dish I was making was a slightly modified version of this Curried Rice Salad, and the only reason it took so long is that I made the garbanzo beans in the slow cooker and the brown rice in the rice cooker that night, too. So, you see, it was an evening of mostly hands-off cooking. Anyway, one of the last prep steps was peeling and chopping the mango. My husband has a mild allergy to the skin of tropical fruits, so I used our new vegetable peeler to remove the offender — and a little bit of my finger. I’ll spare you the photo, but at least we know it works! The completed version of my meal — hopefully without any of my DNA — will be on the blog tomorrow.

Before I gave a little piece of myself to today’s food, I had the second night of our taco salad. Behold:

That’s lettuce, black beans, roasted corn, avocado, and creamy dill dressing — all prepared lovingly at home. (X’s had cherry tomatoes, too.) I then added my friends Corn Chips and Pepper Sauce:

Effing. Awesome. Everything was prepared (and the first half eaten) Monday night and then stored separately, so making dinner took about three minutes. Let’s talk about the creamy green dressing . . .

You should make this. Yeah. For realsies. Unless your blender is broken. (Tear)

Creamy Vegan Dill Dressing

  • 1 cup raw cashews, soaked overnight (you can use whole cashews or pieces)
  • 1/4-1/2 cup water
  • Juice of 1 lime or lemon
  • 1-2 garlic cloves
  • Large handful of fresh dill
  • 1/4-1/2 a jalapeno
  • Pinch of salt

Add all ingredients to blender and puree until smooth and creamy. Add as much water as you need to reach the desired consistency.

The flavor was rich with dill but, even with the jalapeno, was not spicy. If you want more heat, throw in as much jalapeno as you can handle. It tasted like creamy heaven on the salad, but I imagine it would be great on basically any veggie, especially as part of a potato salad. LOVE. If you’re allergic to nuts, you could probably sub in silken tofu or avocado in place of the cashews, but I haven’t tried it.

After eating the salad plus some more corn chips dipped in the remaining tablespoon or two of the dressing, I tried watching about a billion different shows on Netflix and Hulu but kept losing interest, so I whipped out the (totally ass-kicking) strength exercises I talked about yesterday. Phew. I also made an easy-but-delicious beverage last night:

It’s based on this recipe from the Global Table Adventure that I’ve been drooling over since May. My only tweaks were using almond milk instead of cow’s and cutting the sugar by half. I followed the directions of serving it in a silly mug:

Though this one was not handmade, and I actually drank it cold this way. It was a delicious treat after my run this morning, and the best part of all is that my husband won’t touch it — as in, won’t even try it because it seems too much like chai. More for me! Side note: Sasha is awesome, and if you aren’t following her culinary trip around the world, you really should. Her cooking and writing inspire me so much, and I even had the pleasure of meeting her once at a blogger event in Tulsa. Oh yes, she does all that global cooking from my hometown. Yay Sasha!

And yes, I ran again. Monday I logged 2.48 miles, but today I hit 2.62. It’s a little victory, but they add up.

Breakfast this morning took place at work and was a sad state of affairs:

A banana and a totally-not-healthy Chewy bar (from the office kitchen), with coffee. I intended to prepare regular overnight oats last night, but I was too exhausted from a combination of the cooking and picking up my husband in hideous traffic after 11:00 last night. Ah, Hollywood.

It’s time for tempeh soup, so I’ll catch you all soon!

Blend no more

13 Aug

Well, Sunday prep day was off to a good start. I bought all my groceries (from the farmers market, Ralph’s, and then a quick jaunt to Trader Joe’s). I made soup for lunches, even though it was approximately 9 billion degrees in the apartment. I even made a batch of iced tea and remembered to freeze my banana AND soak my oats for this morning’s smoothie. Then today started well enough. I got up and went for a run/walk (which wasn’t my best performance, but it was better than sleeping in). I soaked my black beans and my cashews. And then I was ready to make the Overnight Oats Smoothie when . . . my blender went on strike. I have no idea what’s wrong with it beyond the whole it-not-blending thing. It’s probably the motor, but it was definitely still turning, so maybe it’s the blades? I have no idea. Tonight I will see what I can do to repair it using my non-skills. I really need that little beast this week, too, for seven freaking meals. Blargh. Let me just advise all of you not to try making the aforementioned smoothie with an immersion blender. It was chunky. 😦

At least the soup turned out magically delicious:


I added a whole package of tempeh this time and reduced the potatoes slightly (closer to 1 lb than 1.25). It came out thicker than last time, though it is slightly less tangy, but still a wonderful lunch. I may or may not have brought the entire pot with a massive spoon to work:


If I don’t manage to fix the blender, I guess I will attempt to make salad dressing — involving raw cashews — with the immersion blender, too. Excuse me while I shed a tear.


3 Dec

This, friends, is a tale of woe.

Once upon a time, a girl woke up after not-quite-enough sleep but in the mood for a happy Friday off. She took her stinky, craphead dog to the groomer (which has changed its name from Bark Avenue to Doggy Style :/), bought shampoo, and came home for a leisurely morning complete with her beloved Creamy Dreamy Oats.

Today, she decided to do them differently. She upped the almond milk to 1/2 a cup and added half a mashed banana in with the oats. When they were all creamy, dreamy, and cooked, she put them gently into a bowl and topped them with pecans, cinnamon, and a little maple syrup. Fortuitously, her Italian coffee finished brewing at nearly exactly the same time. The morning was set for a delicious beginning:

Fifteen seconds after this photo was taken, this happened:

The moral of the story is: if you’re going to be careless and spill an entire bowl of oatmeal on the floor, make sure it’s unsweetened.

The end.

OK, not really the end. I cleaned up the mess and made myself a second bowl using the same method, and they were delicious.

The end, part II.